How I became a neurodiverse couples counselor

I found out that I am autistic during a family therapist training. This discovery first unsettled my whole self, then slowly helped everything fall into place. I joined an autistic women’s support group. My peers understood and energized me. I also had a lot to contribute, especially when we talked about love. My experience in a 20+ years neurodiverse relationship was valuable to other autistic people.

So I trained as a couples counselor for neurodiverse couples at AANE Asperger/Autism Network and quit the family therapist training. The AANE training goes into my toolbox together with a Positive Psychotherapy family counseling training I had already accomplished and my decade-long experience as a diversity trainer and coach.

I don’t offer therapy to help you change yourself, I offer counseling to help you feel good the way you are.

Read more about my story in my book “Liebe mit Köpfchen”. You’ll also get loads of relationship advice for little money which you can digest at your own pace. So far available only in German language.

I am an autistic middle-aged woman, wife, daughter, mother, grandmother, friend, counselor, trainer and writer.

I grew up and live as a woman, having experienced sexism but also cisgender and heterosexual privilege. I welcome clients in monogamous and heterosexual relationships as well as queer, gay, lesbian, trans, nonbinary, nonmonogamous or polyamorous persons, couples, polycules and other constellations.

I am also a white person in a transcultural relationship and know that privilege and cultural dominance can play out in relationships despite best intentions. Embracing neurodiversity for me entails acknowledging all other aspects of diversity, including those which might be loaded with hurt, guilt and fear. Classisms, racism and sexism affect relationships just as ableism and neuronormativity do.

I’ve had my share of trauma, burn-out, mourning and of fulfilling work and family life, optimism and joy. Nothing human feels alien to me. So don’t be afraid to bring it up.